Always in My Heart
by Timeforachange
Summary: It's the end of season 4 and Sam gets shot. How will Andy react and what will happen afterwards.
1. Chapter 1

It wasn't supposed to happen. They should have been safe in the barn. That was why Best put them there, to keep them from the bad guy. But after their talk and walking out to the parking lot to see Oliver's cruiser there, they went back inside and her whole life went upside down. The moment Sam called out for Ford her whole life went in slow motion, just like the time when she got shot but this time it wasn't her.

Kevin Ford turned around when Sam called and shot him in the chest. Sam went down and hit the floor. Nick shot Ford, but that didn't really register. All she could think about was Sam and how hurt he was. She holstered her gun and ran to him, but time wouldn't go fast enough. When she reached him she kneeled down to help put pressure on his wound. "Stay down, stay down" she had said to him because he was trying to get up or something. She wasn't really sure what he was trying to do, but he shouldn't be moving with a bullet hole to his chest. "We got him" Sam had said and she had responded "Yes we did" but that didn't stop him from saying more. She knew he shouldn't be talking but here he was doing just that and she didn't want him to stop. If he talked she knew he was still alive. "I told you we would" after that he tried to get up again and she put all of her energy to keep him from doing that and keep him on the floor. It didn't take long before she could hear the sirens in the back ground, but knowing how bad Sam's wound could be she knew that they had to get here fast.

In the distance she could see movement and knew the EMT's were here to take care of Sam. So when they got to him she moved out of the way to give them more room. They got him ready to take him to the ambulance, but he didn't go alone she went with him and nobody stopped her. She couldn't leave his side at this point. He had hurt her, yes, but that didn't stop her from caring about him. She didn't want him to get hurt, not in this way and she knew if it had been the other way around he would be at her side too. Looking at him and seeing how pale he looked she took a hold of his hand and squeezed it. On the way to the hospital she told him a little story about when she knew she loved him. It had been a moment in their relationship that she would remember for the rest of her life.

"I'm gonna tell you a story. It was, you know, a normal night. We were lying in bed and my stomach was hurting from laughing, cause you were teasing me of something. I don't remember what. I most have falling asleep or something because all of a sudden I was having this terrible dream. And I couldn't stop crying. You know I was crying and you weren't even awake and I remember you grabbed me. You were holding me so tight all of a sudden; you said "I'm right here. I'm going to hold on to you and I'm never gonna let you go." Right then, I knew I would never feel more loved or more known. Look I know it is small. It was a small moment; it's not even a good story."

"It's a pretty good story" Sam had answered while looking at her. She could see it in his eyes that he meant it. That he really thought it was a good story she had told and he knew that it was real. It had been a moment between them, and it had shown her how much he cared at the time.

"I love you. I Love you. You are my story. Sam…. You" then she had given him a small kiss on his forehead before letting the paramedic do his job. This was it. This could actually be the last time she spoke to him. She didn't hope so, but it could be. At least she got to say this to him and not like Traci that didn't get to say anything to Jerry before he died. Jerry, they couldn't lose another officer, a friend. The whole station would be sad about it. They would lose a good detective. Oliver, his friend would lose another brother. She would also be losing a friend, but also dare she say it, the love of her life. She knew they had had their ups and downs, but deep down she knew she would always love him. He would always be her end game. He had hurt her, but so had she.

Following him in to the hospital she met Traci who gave her a big hug. Traci always knew what to do. The nurses didn't let her see him after he was brought to the hospital. So all she could do was wait until someone told her anything. After a few hours she looked up from her hands and saw a lot of people had come to support Sam and see how he was doing. Nobody had said anything and she was going out of her mind. Was it a good thing that nobody had said anything to them? It had to be. It probably meant that they were too busy working on him. But could it also mean that he was in so bad a condition that they may not be able to safe him? She didn't dare think about that. Not seeing him again, talking to him again would be too much for her. She didn't know how she could live without knowing she could see him every day at the barn. That was the only thing that kept her going for the last couple of month. Well actually since she came back from undercover. Seeing him with Marlo that first day back almost killed her. She was so sure that he would have waited for her to come back after everything he had said to her the day she walked away. About how he loved her and he would do anything to get her back. She had gone home that evening and spend the night in bed crying and hadn't gotten much sleep.

Tears came to her eyes just thinking about that. Sensing a presence beside her she look over at Nick and could see he was a little upset about the whole way she had reacted to the shooting. Of course it wasn't right for her to act the way she had for an ex-boyfriend when you had a new one, but on the other hand they both knew nobody could take Sam's place in her heart.

"I'm sorry" she said. He knew she meant it, she did. She never wanted this to happen, it just did. She had loved Nick as a friend and nothing more. But she just wanted the void left by Sam to be filled and she had let Nick do it. But she knew Nick felt more for her than she did for Nick and she should have stopped it before it got to this. She knew he was hurt sitting here seeing her heart break again for a guy who broken it so long ago. That was why he spoke up when the doctor said that one person could see Sam.

"Right here" he said without hesitation.

"It's okay" she said to that. Deep down she wanted so badly to see Sam, but she also knew that some of his longtime friends should see him instead. For god sake they weren't a couple, no matter what she really wanted deep down.

"Go it's fine" Nick said. She had been so close to breakdown that he knew she needed this. She needed to see him one last time if he was going to die. He also knew that he had lost the minute Sam took the bullet. He had lost her and he was fine with that if, and it's a big IF, Sam didn't hurt her again. He knew he couldn't have a girl who loved someone else. He had known that for a long time, he just hoped that she would change her mind. She obviously hadn't changed her mind and probably never would as long as Sam was still around. Not that Nick wanted him dead or anything.

Walking into that room was something that she could never prepare for. There he was lying on the table with a tube coming out of his mouth and people trying their best to help him. She just stood there, looking. She didn't know what to do. She froze. Couldn't move. It was like she was in another world, looking in on what was going on. People moving around at a fast speed trying to stop the bleeding. People moving around her without her notice. It was like she couldn't breathe.

This wasn't happening.

**AN: I hope you liked this chapter. Tell me what you think.**


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Thank you so much for the reviews. It's so nice to see that people love this story and like to read it. Here's the next chapter for you guy's.**

The alarms in the room were going out of control and people were moving around really fast to try and get the patient stable. She stood frozen looking at him. Hoping he would make it through and be okay. But who was she fooling? This was serious, he was hurt really bad. Nobody could do anything right now to make her feel any better. This was Sam lying on that table. She took a few steps back and her back hit the walk. Feeling the surface behind her, she let her emotion go and sank down to the floor.

Looking up at Sam again her mind went back to some happier times, where Sam's life wasn't hanging by a thread. The first time she had met him, she thought he was a drug dealer and didn't want to disappoint on her first day on the job. After hearing about the description of a suspect matching Sam's she went after him. She was so nervous going down the fire escape calling for backup, but after not hearing any responses she kept following him. She found him down an alley talking to the guy he ran with and arrested them, or at least tried to. Sam took a chance and ran, but she was not far behind. She tackled him and brought the two guys to the squad car.

How was she supposed to know he was working undercover? Nobody had told her anything about the secret handshake cops give when under. He had been really pissed and she got that. She really did. He spent eight months undercover but in reality she didn't really blow his cover Jerry did. If Jerry hadn't said anything when they took him into the station, then none of it would have happened. All that aside he did help her in the end to catch a killer.

She should have seen the signs sooner. She knew that now, looking back at their history. But maybe it's true what they say; love makes you blind. She knew people around them thought they had slept together way before they actually did, but that's not who they were. Or maybe they were those people, but never got the opportunity. Who knows? All she knows is that she saw something in him that first day they met. Even though there were signs she missed the opportunity when it was right in front of her. She had screwed up back then too. Instead of following her heart she had listened to her head and turned her back on the chemistry between them. She did tell him that she did not date cops, but what a lie that was.

Looking up again more people had come into the room and she could hear them talking about Sam's condition. She couldn't hear what they were saying, but by the sound of their voices it wasn't good news. How long she had been sitting on the floor, she didn't know and she didn't care. She just wanted him back. Even though they weren't together she didn't want anything bad to happen to him. Of course it hurt that they weren't together anymore but that didn't mean that she didn't care. Just like she knew Sam didn't want anything to happen to her. He had told her that more than once. Looking back to the first time he said it to her, she can see the meaning of his words. She didn't see it at the time, but he meant it and not just as a TO.

All the time she could have spent with him, if she had just opened her eyes. But no, she had stuck to Luke. Not that he weren't a good guy, he was. Something had just been a little off for her. She made excuses for not staying at Luke's house when he would wake up, and that just wasn't her. And Sam had said something to her at that time that also made her question Luke, about how he always finds a new rookie every year. But that did not stop her from dating him. Luke was good to her, and she liked him.

The room was quiet and that was what made her look up in fear. What had happened? Where were people? She was all alone in the room now. Nobody else was there. Not even Sam.

"No, no, no" she said looking around for anything that would tell her that Sam was still alive and not taken to the morgue. She saw towels covered in blood lying around the whole room. Towels with Sam's blood on it. His clothes were also lying on the floor after it had been cut off of him. This shouldn't have happened to him. He should not have been lying on that table just minutes ago trying to fight for his life. Only to be in the hands of doctors to save it. Looking back at the blooded towels more tears came running down her face and she could do nothing to stop them.

She really hoped that they had taken Sam in to surgery or something and that was the reason for him not being here anymore. Feeling the presence of a person sitting down next to her. She turned around to see who it was and was glad to find her best friend looking back at her.

She could feel Traci put her arms around her and she was grateful for that. She really needed it. She leaded her head on Traci's shoulder and started to cry softly. How was she supposed to get through this without the help of her friends? She knew everybody cared for Sam and they would all be sad if he died. But how was she supposed to look at Oliver and tell him that his friend had died? He was healing in another room in this hospital and probably didn't know anything about what happened. Or how was she supposed to tell Sam's only family member left, Sarah his sister that her brother had died? How was she supposed to do that? She couldn't even look Nick in the eyes and tell him what was going on in her head. She couldn't go out there right now facing all the people when she didn't know, for herself, how she was feeling. She couldn't go out to Nick, who was her boyfriend, when she knew that she still loved Sam. She really screwed up.

And she didn't want to leave this room because she was afraid that if she did she would never see Sam again. This was the last place see had seen Sam and she could still feel his presence. She could feel all the tension they had between them and all the love. She couldn't leave this room and forget all of that. Being in here she remembered all the good times they had had together as partners, but also as a couple. She also remembered all the bad times, but it was the only thing that made her feel he was still alive. It was what would make her get through the next many hours before she could see him again. And see that he survived.

**AN: I really hope you liked this chapter as well. Please let me know that you think.**


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